So, with everything that’s happened this week… I totally forgot about HNT and I just don’t have the drive to whip something up. So no HNT this week, sorry guys! I know, you were looking forward to more cleavage, weren’t you?

Well, I went to the visitation for Arielle. And I went to her funeral. I have to say, the funeral wasn’t really her… Despite the Phantom of the Opera music they played at the beginning. It was far too Episcopalian, it wasn’t the Arielle I knew and loved. And it was really strange to see a guy with fifty piercings on his face carrying her coffin up before the altar. But there were little things that brought her out. Her aunt actually read what I’d written in the online guestbook to everyone there. Got my name wrong, but that’s to be expected. It didn’t matter, the people who know me, knew that it was me.

The reception afterwards was actually really fun. Her parents catered it, since they have a catering company, with all of Arielle’s favorite foods. That girl liked some kickass food. I remember there was this rice with cranberries in it that she’d told me was simply amazing once, and I told her she was insane. Which she agreed to, of course, in typical Arielle fashion. Anyway, they had that there so I tried a big heaping of it. And you know what? It was simply amazing.

I met this guy Ethan too, he was pretty fun to talk to. I stood around chatting with him and Naomi and another friend, Alli, cracking jokes and stuff like Arielle would’ve wanted. He was supposed to drive us to Club Xile last night, but something came up so we had to find another ride. Which meant James!

Now, this James is nearly 21 and I’ve known him for like, 7 years. I went to school with him from 7th grade on. We were never exactly close, but I always knew him and always said hi or talked to him if I got the chance. So, I spent the day with him. Let’s not go there.

So we picked Naomi up at like… Uhh… 9? I think around 9pm and we headed off to the club, which was in Garden Grove. Now, Xile is a goth club that Arielle began to frequent regularly during the three months before her death. The reason we were going is that they were holding a wake, from 11-11:30 to midnight. So we headed off, me’n Naomi looking all scene and stuff. We didn’t mean to, but we got there and were like… “Damn. We should’ve dressed up, if only because we’re totally out of place.”

The wake was more the Arielle I knew. Cursing, shouting, general loud noises and hollerings, and plenty of crying over her and Chauncy Reed, her friend that also died in the car. And of course, Arielle’s parents were there dressed in full goth regalia. With her mother wearing what was basically just a bra. And her mom is… well, she’s large. But hey, she looked totally awesome. Even Arielle’s grandmother was there! One of the MCs, Raven, was introducing people to say a bit about the girls. And in the background, on the walls and on a TV screen, they were playing a montage of pictures of Arielle and Chauncy.

Yeah, there were plenty of goth kids crying, and I was crying too. I honestly regret not getting in touch with her when I had the chance. We had a moment of silence at midnight, and then they began playing Arielle’s and Chauncy’s favorite music from the club. I have to say, watching them dance was… interesting. I’ll have to like, videotape it or something sometime. It was… I can’t describe it, honestly, so I won’t try.

We left not long after that and headed to Denny’s for some food. I have no money now, I donated to the memorial fund and bought some dinner. I’m so going back next Wednesday with Naomi and James. I’m gonna have to get one of the club owners, Jim, to get me in though, since I don’t have an ID. It’s 18+ but I don’t have an ID. Damn. He got me and Alli in, since Alli is underage and… I don’t have an ID.

Even so, I’m looking forward to it.

I got a text message on Saturday morning from Naomi… It said that Arielle Estremo had been killed while driving home from a club, by a wrong way driver on the 5 freeway.

That was a shock. Arielle was a good friend for my first two years of high school. We hung out every day after school, walking to the library down the street from the school. We complained together, laughed together, and definitely fought. My junior year she moved away and the things I found out she was doing, I did not agree with. We lost contact, and those last two years of high school I disliked the girl she’d become.

I heard she joined the Marines, but she has an honorable discharge from the ARMY. I’m not sure why, all I’ve heard were rumors. I didn’t hear anything about how she was doing for over a year. Until I got that text.

She was 20 years old, driving a Sentra home from a club with three other friends; a girl and two boys. Apparently Naomi knew one of the guys. Arielle was killed behind the wheel, her female friend was killed as well, and one of the boys was critically injured. The wrong way driver died as well.

I don’t want to say it didn’t bother me. I guess maybe it took a while to sink in. My mom got me the visitation information but I’m not sure I really want to go. I don’t know if I want to see her that way. I know, everyone says I should go because I need the closure. I dunno, it just… I think it would bother me to see her like that. Because honestly, she was one of the most animated and active girls I knew. Seeing her so lifeless just isn’t something I want to see.

I asked Naomi if she wanted to go, she said the same. She couldn’t see her that way, didn’t want to remember her like that. And Naomi never even really liked her. Even so, it’s a blow that hit close to home. We both knew her, and I had been her friend. Plus, she was only a year older than us.

It didn’t help, knowing she died 3 hours after my birthday ended.

If you’d like the story, click here. They even have a video.

Alright, so… I took this picture last week for this week’s HNT. I figured you all deserved some boobs, since I couldn’t find my crotch shot. But the boobs aren’t exactly the subject, either… My cat gave birth about five weeks ago, and I named one of those little kittens Angel after my friend. So, this is more about Angel than the boobs.

However, there are two boobs and a kitten. xD

Now, you all know you wanna click that picture for a larger image. ;D Go on don’t be shy. The kittens bites, but I don’t. Well, I don’t bite hard anyway.

Gawd, I love that bra. Happy HNT!

Yeah, I’m almost nineteen years old. My birthday is this Friday. It’s a little odd to think about, really. I never pictured myself at this age. I think I’ve mainly been living from year to year. That’s probably a bad thing, I know.

I wasn’t planning on doing much for my birthday. I’m taking Friday off work and just sitting on my [fat] ass at home. My mom says it’s no different from what I usually do… But instead of having an actual birthday party, a friend of mine [Angel] is throwing me a virtual one. Also, there’s a virtual prom that day… I’m so lame I can taste my failure, heh. On Saturday I’m supposed to go to Knott’s Berry Farm, which is this amusement park that beats the crap out of Disneyland but fails in comparison to Six Flags. Anyway, I had four free tickets; two my mom’s and two mine. But my mom wasn’t gonna go, so I got hers. I was planning on taking Tyler, Naomi, James and… well, me.

Unfortunately…

Naomi calls me up late last night and says, “I’m just letting you know, I can’t go to Knott’s.” So I asked what was wrong, ’cause it’s unlike her to pass up something like that. She says, “I just went to the doctor and I have anxiety, I have to take pills to calm myself down. So I can’t go ’cause it’s too much excitement and it’s not good for me right now.”

…….

Bullshit.

So my best friend [and ride] bailed on me. Not to mention I’ve been insanely jealous due to Angel and two other girls who are well… Neh, they like Angel, as do I. But I’m trying my damnedest to be a good girl and not let my bitchy side out. Mainly out of respect for Angel and the fact that I know in this, I cannot win. Basically, this is a reminder of why I don’t usually go after girls. It’s more trouble than it’s worth.

AND MY MOM ISN’T HELPING ANY. D:<

I love ya mom, but seriously. You bug. A lot.

Two more days…

So, my mom and I went to meet Hilly [snackiepoo] last night. I had a good time. Except, they both got to order margaritas and when it was my turn to order a drink, all I could say was, “I’ll have an iced tea.” [On a side note, three glasses of iced tea while sitting around that long is not a good idea if you don't plan to use the bathroom until you get home.]

Anyway, you might’ve guessed that Hilly was dishing out info about TequilaCon. WHICH I WANTED TO GO TO. Except, you know, the whole under 21 thing. *sigh* I just don’t get it. We’re old enough to drive, smoke, and vote… But we’re not old enough to handle alcohol! We can drive around in these big machines that kill, maim, or just cause a general amount of destruction and chaos, but we’re not old enough to order a margarita. It just doesn’t make sense to me.

Anyway, back on subject… Hilly kind of nodded at me and said, “Oh, you were talked about!” I was like, “O rly nao?” [Translation: "Oh really now?"] Which is how I found out that my ass was one fo the topics of discussion. My ass. I mean, come on… MY ASS.

I’m not offended! Far from it! I feel as if I was there in spirit because of all things, MY ASS was a topic of discussion. It brings tears to my eyes…

…Okay, I’m lying, it only makes me grin a bit, but that’s not the point! I’m flattered that people actually think I have a nice ass. I mean, it wasn’t a very good photo or anything… And my ass goes beyond a J.Lo butt.

So to all those who talked about MY ASS [!!!] at TequilaCon… Thank you, for bringing me along in spirit. Heheh.